Infidelity Recovery Therapy

The Initial Shock

At first, you recognize your partner acting differently – working later than usual, distracted, disengaged. Then, you notice an odd charge on the credit card. You ask them about this, but they brush it off as a misunderstanding.

The next thing you know, they are on the phone a lot more often. Who’s on the other end? You’re not sure, but you’re growing more and more curious.

Before you know it, you see the messages rolling in – and you can’t help yourself – you look.

Devastation. A sucker punch to your gut. Your worst fears – confirmed.

Shock. Confusion. Utter disbelief.

Bewilderment and anger seep in.

You keep going over your relationship. “How could they do this? When did they even have the time?!” You sit at your kitchen table trying to put the pieces together to figure out what went wrong.

Anger is at an all-time high – you want to scream and kick them out of your house.

But you want answers.

You want to talk about this, and you want to know all the details. Do they even feel guilty about what they’ve done? About what they’ve broken?

Everything is shattered.

Why? Why would they cheat on me?

There can be many causes for an affair – a great loss, lack of attention, loss of connection, lack of communication, the need to feel desired again – all can play a role.

Sometimes, the affair may have nothing at all to do with the relationship – and everything to do with the person having an affair.

The common thread? It’s not only a violation of your relationship, but it’s a secret that only one partner knows.

This secret and violation create hurt and distrust.

How can I ever trust them again?

When this type of violation happens, the ultimate question is this: “Should I stay, or should I go?”

Divorce seems like the obvious answer, yet you look back on your relationship’s history and wonder if it’s worth saving. But how?

The first step is for the partner who had the affair to take accountability for their actions and genuinely apologize to their partner. Even if there have been problems for years, they must recognize this act of betrayal as an event separate from the relationship’s flaws.

Next, you will both learn new forms of communication. Surviving an affair requires hard work, vulnerability, and open communication.

Restructuring your communication is key to moving forward and healing.

It’s a challenging process.

It’s important to remember that the truth might not come out all at once, either. There are often many layers to go through when an affair happens, so learning patience with your partner is also very important in this process.

When taking accountability and learning how to communicate become priorities, it is then time to define what fidelity means to you as a couple. This requires creating clear and defined boundaries, many of which you’ve never discussed before.

Ultimately, you will define behaviors that allow you to rebuild your trust, while also repairing your self-esteem.

Together, you’ll decide what it looks like to nurture and heal back to a healthy and successful relationship.

Your first marriage is over; are you ready to create a second one together?

This isn’t easy work, and sometimes, you will feel the pain and hurt during our sessions.

We are here to tell you that this works in bringing you and your partner back together.

It’s easy to view an affair only with judgment – but when judgment subsides and open communication blossoms, we can then have productive conversations to repair your relationship.

Are you ready to put in the work to reconnect?

Give us a call today! (817) 562-6089 or click here to request an intake appointment.